Alternative Hypothesis
Interrogating Gender Roles for Reasons Behind the Growth of Trans Identities
I have to confess to a late night habit as I go to sleep: I watch YouTube shorts. I am not sure why, even as most of the ones that I see just reinforce my belief that society and people are tanking for hits. We see the lowest common denominators of human dignity and intelligence on display in the quest for views and lucrative influencer deals.
One short that really struck me involves a creator commenting on a fight between a group of men on the Las Vegas strip. I don’t know what the precedent was, but it appears as though a man and his buddy object to other men making rude comments about the female companions of the first set. So, the men stand to fight. It turns out they are not trained fighters and their fists do not land on their tormentors. The commenter asks the rhetorical question “How do these men not grow up knowing how to fight and defend themselves?” For each swing and miss, the commenter comments “Too much estrogen.”
This is the sort of ideal that many men associate with what being a man really means. It’s the traditional role of “boxer - defender of women” role that plays on our minds to make us wonder if we fit the definition of masculinity that peers value. I don’t fit that definition. I’ve never like fighting, and as a kid I never got into fights nor did a wrestle with other boys as play. If I were on the Strip and a Real Man made rude marks about my date, I would not be able to land a punch.
Part of the reason that I have been sporting a beard has been to signal some portion of masculinity. It seems to lend acceptance in to the “man club,” that otherwise may elude me. I am going to start shaving my beard and mustache again soon, because I took some professional portraits clean-shaven, and I think I look better than way.
I can promise you that there are many males who do not think they are real men event in this post “Free to be, you and me!” age of regression from feminism. And especially teens, who are trying to figure out who they are, think they fall short of the ideals of manliness. I suggest that a reason for the growing number of those who identify as either non-binary or trans is due to the fact that they do not see themselves as measuring up against the men in big trucks with bull balls hanging from the trailer hitch, or the guys who don’t wear helmets while cruising on their V-Twins.
In this binary world, if they have personalities that favor other pursuits than the manly ones, these boys are going to be easily influenced into believing that they are truly females in the wrong bodies, or perhaps non-binary.
I went through this as a teen myself, and as an adult I reconciled the fact that the traditional definitions of manliness don’t fit my personality. Yes, I ride motorcycle. But I wear a helmet, and that helmet made a huge difference when I fell last summer on my bike. My helmet hit the pavement, and I didn’t suffer any damage to my skull. And I am happy to be able to ride again, but even more happy that I didn’t suffer a brain injury due to a fear of not being seen as manly.
I truly think that rather than putting boys and girls on puberty blockers, with all the contraindications in that regimen, they should be allowed to resolve their differences with manliness or femininity. The protocols have led people to believe that trans identity is as fixed as is sexuality and that the only course is medical affirmation. Countering that notion is deemed hateful, and as I have written in previous posts, I don’t understand why this is so. I don’t understand why so many scientists reject considering the alternative explanations for why pre-teens and teens consider that they have a gender identity contrary, or neutral, to their sex.
Conforming to masculinity or femininity does not work for a great number of kids.
With the potential for life-altering damage from medical and surgical efforts to force the appearance of sex to match the perceived self-identity of someone who is trying to figure it out, why not look at the social reasons for it first? It seems only natural to me.
I 100% agree. I had long believed, even before the current explosion of the transgender community and before it impacted my family, that strict gender roles and stereotypes were the cause of people believing themselves to be transgender. If you tell a little boy “boys don’t cry”, “boys like sports”, “boys don’t want to play with dolls”, “boys don’t like sparkles”, or “boys don’t want to kiss other boys”, boys who don’t feel they can meet all of those criteria might conclude that they aren’t really boys.
I think the dynamic is similar for girls. In an era where “instagram influencer” is considered the definitive look for girls, where every young woman’s appearance is constantly being judged and commented on, where being shallow and appearance-obsessed is the stereotype that teenage girls have to contend with, is it any wonder that some of them decide they just aren’t willing or able to compete in that arena?
These kids internalize warped definitions of man and woman and then hate themselves for not living up to those definitions. When someone offers them a way out, a way in which it isn’t their fault that they don’t measure up to the faulty definitions, these kids will take it to relieve their sense of shame over not being “good enough”.
as a bookish “fag” during my youth, I can understand this for sure! Great essay, Mike.
I wonder if I were a teen now they would have steered me into this nonsense? Maybe not because I grew up in Indiana, but social media is dominant even in red states!